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Chapter 18 – New year’s eve
The quilt had not been tanned and was heavy, a little breathless when pressed on the body, and there was a faint damp smell. Chi Tang was a bit unable to sleep, the curtains were half-drawn, and she left some gaps so that she could see the snow outside.
The phone rang suddenly, and Chi Tang pressed on the voice note from her father and his voice echoed loudly in the room, “Don’t come back if you are not sleeping at home today”.
Chi Tang didn’t expect it to be so loud, so she immediately lowered the volume but You Yu heard it too.
You Yu kept her eyes closed and didn’t move. Chi Tang thought she was asleep. After the voice was broadcast, she heard You Yu ask, “Aren’t you going back?”
Chi Tang was originally leaning on her side but when she heard the words she lay down on her back and dropped her phone, “I’m not going back.”
It was not the first time her father said that.
Some people were setting off fireworks outside, the new year was almost here. Everyone was at home.
Fireworks exploded for a long time in the distance and many complicated emotions in Chi Tang’s heart exploded like fireworks.
“My parents are divorced and they have been in lawsuits for a long time.” Chi Tang looked at the ceiling and said, “At that time, apart from arguing for property and their houses, they were arguing for my custody rights, but not arguing because they wanted me, they were arguing because they didn’t want me.”
“My mother was afraid that I would stick to her and delay her marrying a good man. She secretly gave me a lot of pocket money and asked me to choose my dad.”
“But my dad doesn’t want me since I’m not a son. Unfortunately, he found out that he was sick and except that, he will have no children in the future so he recognized the bad luck and continued to raise me. But he hates me very much. I used to hate me even more, thinking that I was taking his son’s place.” Chi Tang said.
“He always blames me when he is drunk, saying that if he can only have one child in his life, why can he not be a boy.”
You Yu listened quietly. She had guessed that Chi Tang might not have a good relationship with her family, but she never thought it would be so.
Chi Tang realized that she had said too much, but couldn’t help feeling the grievance and anger in her heart, and finally, she spit out a sentence full of resentment: “If you don’t want me, why did you give birth to me in the first place?”
The little sun was not off, and the warm yellow light made the room very bright. You yu turned her head and saw tears in Chi Tang’s eyes which were about to fall.
She didn’t know what to say, so she sat up and pulled a paper towel, gently pressing the corner of Chi Tang’s eye.
Chi Tang didn’t look at her, took the paper towel, turned over and looked at the opposite wall, and stopped making a sound.
After a while, You Yu didn’t hear any movement from her, so he guessed in his heart that Chi Tang was over sad, probably because he was embarrassed by telling her about those things.
Chi Tang was a very wanting and very stubborn person. When she was at the same table with her, if she was embarrassed by something, she would not say anything and ignore people as she was doing at that time. If it was too embarrassing, she wouldn’t even say much the next day and that would make her look cold.
When they were still unfamiliar, Chi Tang was the first to notice her embarrassment and unexpectedly bought her a bra. This was also the case, showing coldness to hide her embarrassment.
She didn’t want to take it at the time as she was not used to owing something, but Chi Tang’s expression at that time. If she didn’t take it, Chi Tang would have been angry.
Moreover, it was the first time that she gave her something. Although she was not used to it, she wanted to cherish it.
“Chi Tang.”
Chi Tang felt that someone was tapping on her shoulder, and she closed her eyes and did not respond.
You Yu didn’t care and said to her, “When we grow up, everything will be okay.”
That was a sentence that her former teacher said to her and she had been insisting on it.
“Wait until we reach adulthood, we can make money to support ourselves, and find a job we like. Everything is going to be fine, just stick to it.”
Chi Tang didn’t speak, but she was a little uncomfortable and thought: You Yu is no better than me and she still came to comfort me?
With that thought in mind, Chi Tang fell asleep in a daze. You Yu didn’t sleep well. She counted the money she saved and wondered if her dad had given up looking for her. She thought about the future and thought a lot.
Chi Tang’s feet were cold, and she couldn’t sleep warmly. Unconsciously, she stretched out to the side. You Yu felt like she was on a piece of ice. Her thoughts were interrupted by Chi Tang moving closer and she quietly moved her warm feet closer.
The next day Chi Tang woke up and found that You Yu wasn’t in bed. She put on her clothes and went out to take a look. The small living room outside that was not cleaned yesterday was all cleaned up.
Chi Tang: “
”
You Yu was in the kitchen. Chi Tang leaned on the door frame and asked her: “When did you get up, you are almost done with all the cleaning.”
You Yu turned her head to look at her: “Don’t lean against the door frame, the door frame is not cleaned.”
Chi Tang lowered her head and saw a trace on her clothes as expected. When she raised her hand to wipe it, You Yu had already come over with a hot towel to wipe off the dust.
Chi Tang: “Stop cleaning, let’s go out for breakfast.”
You Yu: “Do you want to buy vegetables and cook? It’s new year’s eve so there should be few shops open.”
Chi Tang followed her through the kitchen. The gas stove and gas tank that her grandma used before was gone. Only one induction cooker could be used. The pots and pans were piled up in the cabinet, it was full of dirt. When Chi Tang saw these, she couldn’t muster the effort to deal with them. She wanted to go out and buy new ones temporarily, but before she could say anything, You Yu had already brought water and came over to clean them all.
In the end, Chi Tang could only say: “Go pick hot water for washing, don’t you feel cold with cold water?”
The two ate breakfast and squatted in the room to scrub for a day. Chi Tang didn’t remember how long she hadn’t cleaned it in this way. She didn’t help much. Although she didn’t want to admit it, she liked to help You Yu.
You Yu studied hard and cleaned up. Chi Tang felt that it was almost done several times when she turned her head. She saw You Yu wiping the corners of the cracks.
“No need to wipe there, don’t worry about it.”
“Okay, it will be done soon.”
“Why do you have to drag it under the bed and the sofa?”
“Well, it will be done soon.”
“Don’t wipe it there, we won’t stay long.”
“Okay, I have finished wiping.”
Looking at the busy back of her deskmate, Chi Tang felt speechless. Why did she make it like their home, so effortlessly cleaning and tidying?
But Chi Tang had to admit that when the house was cleaned, she also felt a little more at ease. It seemed that the place was no longer a temporary place to stay, but a house that one could live in.
They ate instant noodles for lunch. In the evening, Chi Tang was planning to find a small restaurant that was still open to invite You Yu to have a good meal, but she overestimated this small county. There were no other businesses except for a few supermarkets. The shop was still open but there was no restaurant.
“Then let’s buy dumplings and cook them.” You Yu didn’t care, taking the dumplings in the freezer.
In the end, they bought dumplings and glutinous rice balls. The two of them walked back with their things, stepping on the snow on the street.
On the night of new year’s eve, each of them held a bowl of dumplings at one end, turned on the little sun, and watched TV programs on Chi Tang’s tablet.
Similar faces, similar openings of the show, colorful festive songs, and dances.
Chi Tang tore two braised eggs and gave one to You Yu. She watched the show with a blank expression: “What ugly clothes, red and green, like a mosaic.”
You Yu wanted to laugh when she saw her talking like this, and though her words were much more interesting than the shows.
Listening to the noise of fireworks outside, You Yu and Chi Tang spent the first new year’s eve together in their lives.