When my mom and dad divorced, they agreed on a schedule for visitations.
Until I turn 18 and graduate from high school, he would visit me once a month, then we would have dinner together to talk about our lives.
We hadnât been able to meet each other in quite some time because of dadâs work schedule, but we used to meet each other once a month. Although we didnât really talk about things like my school life, we would make small talk and have fun together.
I didnât hate my dad, on the contrary, I loved him. I always looked forward to meeting him especially since he always brought me to fancy restaurants.
âŚUntil now.
âNormally, he would double check with our schedules, but he said that heâs busy⌠If he canât meet you on that day then youâll have to wait for the new year before he can meet you again⌠He did ask for your opinion though⌠So, Maki⌠Are you going to meet him?â
âSure. I should at least meet him as a thank you. After all, Iâve been receiving money from him.â
I didnât know how much money he gives me each month, but part of the money used to buy the clothes I wore should be his.
If possible, I donât want to refuse him.
ââŚBy the way, MomâŚâ
âWhat is it?â
Suddenly, Minato-sanâs face came to my mind.
Does mom know about her? Sheâs dadâs subordinate and they seemed to have known each other for a few years already. Seeing the scene yesterday made me suspicious about something.
Did they get close after or before the divorce happened?
If it was the former, then heâs free to do whatever he wanted, but if it was the latterâŚ
I wonder what kind of face I should make when I meet him later.
ââŚMaki⌠Maki?â
ââŚW-What is it, mom?â
âYou look pale, are you okay? Are you exhausted because of your first date?â
âAh⌠Y-Yeah, probably⌠I couldnât sleep last night because I was nervous⌠Also, we went all out at karaoke, so, yeahâŚâ
âIs that so? Then, you should quickly eat your dinner, take your bath and go to sleep. Oh before that, make sure to call Umi-chan first. Thank her for the date.â
âI-I got it, quit nagging meâŚâ
I swallowed the words I was about to say. I shouldnât bring it up to her.
Of course I was curious about this matter, but even if she knew about it, it wouldnât change anything. But if she didnât know about it, things would turn messy real quick.
Both options seemed bad, so it should be better for me to shut up.
ââŚIf thatâs all, Iâm going to bed early⌠I have a lot of work tomorrow, so, good night.â
âGood night⌠Ah, right, mom, can I ask you something?â
âWhat is it?â
âDo you still love dad?âŚâ
At that question, my mom stopped moving.
ââŚWhy?â
âWhy are you asking this question now?â She made that kind of face.
ââŚS-Sorry, itâs been a while since Iâve last seen him⌠I was just curious⌠Sorry, that was a weird questionâŚâ
âNo, itâs fine. You decided to follow me without questions after all, itâs normal to be curious about something like this.â
She sat back down on the sofa and lit the cigarette that was sitting on the table.
âYour dad, huh? âŚWe divorced because of various things⌠There were times when seeing his mug made me feel sick, but I know that deep inside my heart⌠I still like him⌠I canât even throw away our family albumâŚ.â
âYou have the album, mom?â
âYeah. You know, weâve been married for fifteen years⌠Maybe longer⌠We made a lot of good memories, I couldnât bring myself to throw it away⌠Wait a second, Iâll get it for you.â
She brought the album from her bedroom.
There were various pictures of me inside the album. Back when I was born, my first shichigosan, my kindergarten days, our family vacations, entrance and graduation ceremonies and so on. Most of the pictures ranged from back when I was first born to around the time when I reached seven or eight years old. (T/N: Shichigosan as in the shrine visit thing. Thereâs a culture in Japanese where theyâll bring their child to visit nearby shrine when they turn 3, 5 and 7, hence the shichi (7) go (5) san (3))
âI was a big crybaby back thenâŚâ
âHehe⌠True. Back then you would cry if someone other than me or your dad tried to hold you. Youâll try to hide behind our backs whenever we try to take a picture of you. The only time when we could get a good shot of your face was when you didnât face the camera properly.â
Like she said, there were only a few pictures of me where I was looking at the camera. I had a few back when I was a toddler, but as soon as I entered kindergarten, there were none of them. It was during the time when I started feeling shy when someone tried to take a picture of me.
I thought I was a quiet kid back in the day, but apparently my younger self was a selfish brat.
Well, even now, Iâm still a selfish brat.
âMom, can I borrow this?â
âSure, just take it⌠Did Umi-chan or someone else ask you for it?â
ââŚYeah, something like thatâŚâ
I promised them that Iâd show them to Umi and Amami-san, so I should fulfill that promise. Of course Iâll take out the naked baby pictures of me or else it would be a disaster.
But, they would probably notice that I took those pictures away and Umi will start bugging me about itâŚ
âAnyway, just take it if you want to. Iâm going to bed now, so good night, MakiâŚâ
âGood night. Iâll clean everything up later.â
âAlright, thank youâŚâ
She extinguished her cigarette and went to her room.
ââŚI couldnât ask herâŚâ
Dad, mom and me. I muttered that as I stroked our family photo.
It had been a year since me and my mom left our previous home. Both of us finally got used to our new life. My mom was content with her work and I managed to gain a couple of friends.
I didnât want to ruin this daily life of oursâŚ
That was why I decided to forget about everything that happened today.