The morning after I had been utterly let down, I saw Freed off as he headed for work and idly sat on the bed in his bedroom.
Naturally I thought about him.
Itās something Iād vaguely felt for a long time, but I noticed suddenly.
I canāt help but see Freed as cool.
No, of course I know heās cool. Itās natural of the beautiful prince hailed as flawless.
Itās not in that sense, or rather I apply maidenly filter, or ratherā¦ Yup, itās that my beloved person looks cool.
āUwaaaaaa!!ā
Finding it too much to endure, I rolled on the bed. Iām so embarrassed I want to die.
I thought Iād been slightly strange since yesterday.
Since Freed helped me, my heart throbbed strangelyā¦ This is bad.
Iām happy to be on his side, I feel awfully lonely when weāre apart.
I encamped myself in his office yesterday because I wanted to be with him even a little longer.
While in the office, I got my fill of his figure.
When our eyes met once in a while, for some reason both of us broke into a smileā¦
I recalled Brother nagging us to stop flirting each time.
No, Iām not flirting! I fiercely appealed to Brother, but now I understand.
Sorry, Brother. I was flirting. Yes.
Even now while remembering yesterday, Iām in his bed seeking his lingering scent like this. Hey, what are you doing, me! Return to sanity.
āI loveā¦ Freedā
Guooooooo!!
As I tried muttering that, I received damage. Greatly perplexed I rolled left and right on the bed.
What are those maidenly thoughts! Itās not like me at all.
Perish, perish, periiiiish!
I donāt know what the hell suddenly happened to me.
But, looking back on my actions or feelings yesterday, I think thatās probably the case. I remember this sensation.
āāāā Thatās why I wanted to be embraced so much.
Once I noticed my feelings, I also understood the reason why it was desperately miserable not to be embraced yesterday. I didnāt care about Prince Maximilianās matter. I wasnāt hurt. I simply wanted him to embrace me because I love him.
āItās too embarrassingā¦ā
I muttered flopped on the bed. My whole face, especially the ears, filled with heat.
However, now that it happened, after all I should tell him directly.
I received his feelings a long time ago. Itās late, but if I tell him heāll surely, no, absolutely be happy.
If I do that, itāll be an openly mutual love. A dazzling normie everyday will begin.
Since I was born a dukeās daughter, I thought I couldnāt expect marriage out of love, so itās an unexpected joy.
Ah, but what should I do.
I grinned thinking of the sure lovey-dovey lover period, but suddenly I calmed down.
If I recognize I love him, I have zero confidence in refusing him.
I think I havenāt refused him much until now either, but thatās exactly why Iām scared that I seem to be gradually accepting everything.
Fundamentally, Iām aware Iām soft on my beloved.
Itās simple to predict Iāll respond as demanded.
Rather, I find it unpleasant how I seemed to assertively snuggle to him to get embraced.
āAaaahā¦ What should I doā¦ I wonāt be able to refuseā¦ Nn?ā
While having fortunate worries, I suddenly noticed something odd.
Having recognized that I love him, Iāve been thinking of embarrassing things since a while ago.
Moreover, the impetus was being saved from that Crown Prince.
Yes, ever since I saw Freed immediately afterwards my heart has been violently pounding, it turned into the feeling of embarrassment.
ā¦ No matter how I look at it, isnāt it too much?
The timing, and the various things.
āā¦ Wait. Perhaps this could be whatās called the āsuspension bridge effectāā¦?ā
When I thought of it, plenty things applied.
Suspension bridge effect.
āA physically excited person realizes they are in loveā, itās a well know idea.
It hasnāt been strictly proven, but the conclusion is that itās generally correct.
In other words, what I want to say is, because I had been attacked by Crown Prince Maximilian and with my mind in an excited state saved by Freed, I developed an emotion of pseudo-love, itās that kind of thing.
āWowā¦!ā
The template applies to the situation so much Iām astonished.
Come to think of it, until now I shouldāve had many moments with Freed when my heart beat fast.
Still I didnāt recognize those as love. I think they were in the grey zone.
Because, those werenāt as clear as yesterday.
ā¦ Right, yesterday was overly easy to understand. Thatās why I came to realize I love himā¦
I see, suspension bridgeā¦ Itās beyond my expectations.
And yet, unaware, I thoughtlessly said stupid things like Iām in love, Iām too foolish. Iām an idiot, idiot.
āBadā¦ Iām glad itās before I said I love himā¦ā
I couldnāt possibly confess and then say that after all it was a misunderstanding. Itād be rude to Freed.
Dangerous, dangerous.
ā¦ Yup, I need to carefully verify this.
Are the current feelings brought forth by suspension bridge effect, or because I actually truly fell in love with Freed.
Before I reach that conclusion, I absolutely mustnāt tell it to Freed.
I should keep these feeling a secret.
I got up from the bed, and having tidied up my hair stood up.
I left the bedroom, and headed for the room with the sofa.
āā¦ Thereās still timeā
The wedding ceremony is approaching, but thereās still some time.
Until then letās exhaustively verify whether I really love Freed. This is an important matter. I need to proceed with caution.
Of course, if Iām convinced I really love him before the limit, Iāll tell him at that time.
Even if the limit comes and I still donāt knowā¦ Well, Iāll just get married as planned.
As one would expect, I donāt think the suspension bridge effect will continue for such a long time. Therefore, if my currents feelings continue until then, even if I donāt understand them, itāll mean I really love him.
In case I reach the conclusion that I donāt love himā¦ Well, since that wonāt be the case I donāt have to worry about it.
I nodded, and with then itās fine , finished my inner monologue.
āāāā However, I shouldāve noticed there.
That when I thought itās impossible Iād reach the conclusion that I donāt love him and that itās a misunderstanding, I already recognized I love him.
Nevertheless, the me who kept being called dull ultimately didnāt notice it.
āā¦ Alright, until I understand whether I really love Freed, letās call Freed my beloved (provisional)!ā
Carefreely I thought up such an inconsequential name.