The Blue Monster's Shell Volume 1 Chapter 1 part8-9

Part 8

Translated by iseuli

Edited by Risa

Perrin was able to pass the first winter safely.

Perrin was 8 when I announced the beginning of spring. That day, Perrin kept himself in the corner of the cave and cried silently. He bit his lips closed until they bled, conscious of my watchful eyes. He didn’t let out a single sound as streams of tears fell from his eyes. It didn’t look like he was hurting anywhere, I was confused as to why he was crying. At the time, I couldn’t understand him at all.

“Are you crying?”

I asked because I was curious. Perrin panicked and hurriedly wiped his tears away with his arms. His face was red and bloated from all the crying.

“I didn’t, idiot!”

That was the first time he swore at me. Perrin continued to change. He stopped begging, though he was still scared of me. Nonetheless, he faced off against me while looking straight into my eyes. I don’t remember well but from that day on, he dropped all sorts of honorifics with me. 1)

If he used to be a flower that lived in a greenhouse, now he was like a weed. His once noble face was now covered with scars and injuries. It wasn’t just his outward appearance that changed, his weak spirit was no more and had grown to a ferocious one. It seemed like he realized that this was the only way for him to survive in this forest.

“Perrin. What are you doing now?”

On the second winter, Perrin cut me deeply with a huge sharp rock. He decided to kill me before I could eat him. I already knew his intentions from the start. His eyes dripped with killing intent, but he was being so ridiculous that I had ignored the small event as a whole.

“You are a wicked child.”

I pushed him away as weakly as I could muster to stop him, but maybe my strength was still too great. Perrin’s body flew meters across the air and he ended up with a broken arm. Still, he didn’t let out the smallest groan of pain and simply glared menacingly to me. Perrin didn’t quit. Whenever he saw a chance, he tried to kill me.

When we passed by the swamp, he pushed me in. He sharpened wooden spears and attempted to stab me to death. One time, he actually managed to push me off a cliff. Of course I didn’t remain quiet.

“Can you stop? Must I beat you the same way for you to stop annoying me?”

I let him experience the same thing I went through. I threw Perrin into the swamp. I took the spear he sharpened and stabbed his thigh. I even threw him off the cliff.

Of course I carried everything out with the least strength I could muster just so he could understand how annoyed I was. I thought he would come to understand me. I was truly stupid.

“Why isn’t he complying? Am I going about everything the wrong way?”

The child didn’t quit, rather his fighting spirit grew stronger. He didn’t look like a human any longer. Even baby monsters probably wouldn’t be able to be as hateful as he had been.

“Perrin. Think carefully. If you kill me, then you will also die. The other monsters will invade and fight to claim my territory, they would eat you in a snap.”

“So what? It’s the same whether other monsters or you eat me.”

“That…”

I see. He was a smart child. I mumbled to myself. I couldn’t come up with a way to rebut his words. I’m not very sure, but maybe it began on this day. Perrin began to treat me like a complete idiot.

He didn’t stop trying to kill me, and the second winter passed quietly.

He brought me all sorts of things to eat, and eventually I lost my chance to eat Perrin once again. Whenever I thought that it was the right time to kill him, he would disappear and throw food at my feet.

“Just eat that. You’ll regret eating me.”

“Why?”

“If you keep me alive, I’ll keep bringing you all sorts of different kinds of food. You can just sit there and eat whatever I bring you.”

“Eat….”

I looked down at the things he brought. He brought me a small frozen bird, a small snake that froze to death, and all sorts of mysterious rocks. It was so stupid that I didn’t know what to say. He brought me various things and confidently ordered me to eat, it was comical. Weirdly, it didn’t make me mad at all.

“Yes…. You’re quite a hunter considering your age….”

Was I doing the right thing? I observed all the things Perrin brought for me with curiosity. Eating Perrin would be much better than eating these sorts of things. I don’t have to eat all of him, I could just eat a single arm…

“I warned you not to eat me.”

Perrin glared at me with his single remaining eye. He appeared like a monster that was about to kill its prey. His body tightened with anxiety, but his eyes remained absolutely still and firm. Suddenly, I remembered the time I first met the child. The child didn’t try to do anything and just cried and begged me to save his life. He had grown a lot.

It was just a small bit actually, but I felt quite proud. I began to wonder how long this child would be able to survive in this forest. How much would he be able to adapt to this forest? I became very curious, but that single reason wasn’t enough for me to spare his life. Still.

“Fine, this winter isn’t very cold anyway.”

I chose not to eat Perrin. I endured through my hunger while I kept him by my side. At the time, I didn’t understand what this truly signified. That was how Perrin survived the second winter. The third winter, however, was a different story. It was the coldest winter that I ever felt. Every day was weary because I couldn’t catch anything to eat.

That year, Perrin attempted to do something he should have never done.

Part 9

By our third winter, Perrin was 10. The forest was covered in twice the amount of snow to make up for last winter’s warmer days. The snow never stopped falling and it was difficult to breathe because the wind was so cold.

As the days continued, Perrin gradually became increasingly anxious. He had been able to pass two winters, but it seemed it would be difficult this winter. Whenever he returned to my lair with empty arms, he sat in the cave corner and unceasingly glared at me. I went out to hunt for food, but I frequently returned without anything to eat. So, I had no choice but to endure my hunger.

“Perrin, I’m hungry.”

I just wanted to complain.

“I’m so hungry.”

I mumbled and looked to Perrin. It had been many days since all my winter food stocks hit rock bottom. The only remaining food stock I had was sitting in front of me now.

Do I eat him now? No. I can endure a bit longer. I might catch something tomorrow. Should I just eat him now? No. It won’t hurt to wait just one more day. He’s too small, I’ll only become more hungry after I eat him.

I had to fight my natural instincts to eat everyday. One day, two days, and three days had passed. I didn’t know why I had to endure my hunger, but I endured.

Whenever I glanced to him, Perrin’s body shook. He would pick up a rock and get ready to throw it as he glared back at me.

“You… stay away.”

“Perrin, I’m-.”

“Stop telling me you’re hungry. I’ll cut off your tongue.”

His eyes were demonic. It truly seemed like he would literally cut off my tongue. Though in reality, that was not possible in the least. He was bluffing, and as long as I choose to, I could eat him any time I wanted. But I chose not to.

“You should talk nicer. It’s not nice to say that you’ll cut off someone’s tongue.”

I said and looked away. I couldn’t eat today as well. I was feeling sad because I was hungry. I regretted looking at Perrin because my appetite only increased. I complained inwardly and simply kicked around the rocks on the floor.

“Perrin. Can you give me just one of your legs?”

I couldn’t endure and asked, Perrin threw many rocks at me.

“Stop throwing rocks. I won’t eat by myself. I’ll share it with you. Then, we can both survive this winter.”

This was a very logical and sound decision. It was ingenious. Perrin wouldn’t die either, so it was a fair trade. However, he took several steps back as he watched me with a burning angry expression.

He had two legs, so I thought it would be fine to take just one. I tried to persuade him, but it was all for naught. If I made up my heart to do so, I could eat him anytime. I asked him for just a leg, or an arm, and I continued to complain. Unknowingly I somehow had grown extremely attached to the child.

At the time, I was still very much a fool. I didn’t know how to properly express myself and continued to treat Perrin as my emergency food stock. I slowly drove Perrin into a corner.

“Perrin, you-.”

One day, when the snow had piled up to my knees, Perrin stepped out of my territory. He intruded into another monster’s territory on purpose and used himself as bait to lure out the monster. His goal couldn’t have been more clear. He planned to kill me before I could eat him. If it was impossible for him to kill me with his own strength, he would just borrow another’s.

He stirred a new territorial battle. He used the natural ways of this forest to kill me.

“He’s crossed my line.”

His new plan was much more effective than all his past attempts combined. It was the first time I became so mad. Why was I so mad back then? Was I angry at the monster who stepped into my territory? Was I mad at Perrin who lured the monster to kill me?

Maybe it was that he risked his own life to bait the monster for his plans. I’m not sure at all. I was feeling very confused and upset, I was too busy fighting off the deer monster which bulldozed into my territory to make sense of anything.

It towered 3 meters in height and had giant sharp horns on its head. It cannoned itself to me and jammed its horns onto my chest area, then proceeded to stomp its foot down at me. Perrin hid himself between the many boulders around this area and simply watched our battle unfold. He was expressionless like a corpse as he watched the two of us. I couldn’t feel any sort of spirit or vitality from him.

“The two of you should just die.”

I heard him mumble under his breath. Perrin, if I die, this deer will eat you. Are you okay with that? I didn’t ask him this question. He had probably carried out this plan knowing that it could happen, so I didn’t criticise him for his decision. He probably didn’t want to die in vain by himself, so he decided to bring me down with him. He had made a foolish decision.

“I won’t die from just this.”

If I could die with a simple hole to my chest, I would have died a long time ago. If a simple stomp could kill me, then I wouldn’t have become the king of the inner forest. I pulled out the deer’s horn from my chest. Immediately, my body began to regenerate. My body which was flattened by the deer, puffed out to its original shape.

“Perrin, I am quite…”

strong amongst those in this forest. I’m not sure whether the child heard me or not. He probably didn’t. It has been a long while since anyone has attempted to usurp my territory. My natural wild instincts to protect my territory exponentially increased my rage.

This was my territory. Perrin was my prey. Everything was mine. Everything in this forest responded in the same way when someone threatened to steal what was theirs. I stood up and displayed my rage.

“Do not covet what is mine.”

My rage exploded out. First, I had to take care of the monster which dared to hunt in my territory. I decided that I would have more than enough time to punish Perrin after everything blew over.

Giant and smaller horns spiked out from all over the deer’s body. It growled and flashed its’ sharp fangs toward me. The deer was one of the stronger predators of the inner forest and had claimed the land adjacent to mine as its own.

“So you want to eat me.”

The deer drooled as looked across to me. It appeared incredibly hungry. Perrin and I were not the only ones to be suffering from hunger this winter. Winter was the cruelest season of all, and so this fight would not end until one of us fell to our death.

Nobody in this forest had the luxury to avoid a fight and live to see a second day. I gradually revealed my hidden true form. Usually, I maintained a size of an average human adult, but for this fight I released the body parts I kept suppressed within my body. I usually prioritized my mobile ability over strength and size, but since I would need to use everything I had to protect my territory. I didn’t hold back.

It only took a short moment to change into my true form. My body expanded and grew out casting everything into my shadow.

“Wha…what’s that.”

Perrin said looking at me. I didn’t change very drastically, I was just a bigger version of my hunting form.

Now, I could easily wrap myself around the 3 meter giant deer. The deer pointed its horns to me and took several steps back.

“Do you think you can escape?”

The monster had taken everything too far for me to easily turn a blind eye to everything. If I let it go, it would look down on me. That was all it took for all the monsters in this forest to turn and target me. I ran and attacked the deer. I wrapped my body around the deer and began to strangle it.

I was parasitic by nature and it was near impossible to escape from my grasp. I drew out the portion of my body with this trait and attached myself to the deer’s hide. The deer’s skin tore off to which it violently shook its body to whip me off.

Territorial battles between two monsters were vicious, but usually the battle ended instantaneously. Two monsters fighting for days on end rarely ever happened, and it was the same this time around.

When the deer stomped me flat, it became high spirited. The next instant, my body size had become many times bigger, and the moment it hesitated, the battle was over.

I snapped its neck, ribs, and hip joints until it jutted out into strange angles. The monster howled in pain. I crushed its bones, ripped out its flesh, then proceeded to crush its organs.

Perrin watched the battle with a lifeless expression. By the time the deer breathed its last breath, Perrin’s eyes were closed. He looked to be in complete despair.

“Perrin, it’s time for your punishment.”

I threw aside the deer’s corpse and decreased my body to my usual size. I wrapped a part of myself around his ankle and lifted him up into the air, and tossed him into the snow. His small figure rolled along the snow.

“Tell me what you did wrong.”

Perrin didn’t answer. He didn’t even try to get up. He didn’t move or even get up from the snow.

“…. I thought.”

He said something quietly that I couldn’t hear well. He spoke once again after a long silence.

“I thought this would go well for sure.”

He thought he could really kill me this time. I laughed and whipped a portion of my body to his direction, and missed him by a hair.

“Don’t make me repeat myself. Tell me what you did wrong.”

Usually, he would immediately bluff, and throw rocks at me while glaring. I was going to punish him no matter what he said this time around. That was my plan, but Perrin wasn’t responsive at all.

“Perrin…?”

Why wasn’t he glaring? Why wasn’t he being shameless? His unusual absence of any sort of response caught me off guard. My raising anger settled a degree.

At the time, I didn’t understand my own emotions. I felt a jumble of confused emotions and I wasn’t sure how to process it at all. My chest squeezed like something was suffocating me.

“You… are you listening to me? You should know what kind of place this is by now. What you tried to do today was bad.”

I purposely conveyed my words in a sharper tone than usual. I waited for Perrin who would rebut back angrily. However, nothing played out like I expected. Perrin remained on the ground, unmoving.

I wondered if he was injured and couldn’t get up. Did I throw him too harshly? It was highly likely. It’s been such a long time since I transformed into my true form that I maybe I failed to properly control my strength.

I stretched out a portion of my body and tapped on his back. This wasn’t such a difficult task, but I felt hesitant.

“Perrin…?”

His back was very small. I needed to punish him, but there wasn’t anywhere that I can hit. As I continued to wonder about my next step, I tapped his back twice more.

“If you’re trying to pretend to have fainted, you can’t trick me. Get up.”

I grabbed Perrin’s shoulder and turned him around. He flipped over like a dried up log, and he was a lot lighter than I remembered. He had lost so much weight that I couldn’t even feel much of his original weight.

“Huh….?”

Perrin was incredibly skinny. This was to be expected. It’s been a long time since we’ve had food, and whatever food he could find, he had offered it to me. After living this way for so long, it would be strange if the child wasn’t so skinny. He had many layers of clothes so I couldn’t tell he had changed at all.

“Perrin, you’re….”

You’re too light. My voice lost strength and trailed to a quiet silent murmur. I had become distracted trying to endure the winter, that I didn’t notice that it had taken nearly all of the child’s vitality. I observed Perrin’s face. He no longer had his usual angry expression, and appeared very weak. The skin around his eyes looked sunken and sickly. How could this be? The child had been starved for barely a month and he was already near death.

“So weak…”

He was truly too weak. I couldn’t muster any sort of anger anymore. I lost any motivation to punish him and shrunk even smaller.

“Perrin. Monsters prioritize their own territories very much… so you should not make them fight against one another like this. So… um… stop pretending to be dead…. Are- are you listening? What I’m trying to say…”

I couldn’t speak properly. The child remained lifeless and I couldn’t think straight. I felt depressed because I don’t know why, and my lecture ended weakly.

Perrin did many horrible things to me. He even tried to kill me. Even so, I didn’t feel mad.

“Don’t do this again.”

That was all I said. Perrin had seen my true form now. He should understand that it would be impossible to kill me and would not attempt something like this again. So, it was fine not to punish him. I was satisfied with my decision.

“The sun will set soon. Let’s return home.”

“Home… Where is my home?”

Perrin exhaustedly rubbed his face. My house is not here. I heard him mumble.

“This place… is hell.”

He didn’t have strength to his voice. I hesitated for a moment and then helped the child up once again. Perrin was a skeleton. He couldn’t stand properly. He had starved for so long that he couldn’t maintain his gait. I didn’t notice until now that one of Perrin’s legs were bleeding.

“Perrin, you’re bleeding.”

He probably scratched himself against something as he was trying to lure the deer to me.

“This… I mean. You’re bleeding a lot.”

I lifted up a portion of his pants. There was a long gash on his lower calf, though it had mostly scabbed over by now. He must have jabbed himself on a pointy rock somewhere.

I blankly watched Perrin, and then decided to carry him instead. He didn’t rebel and quietly sat on top of me.

“Don’t go out to hunt for the time being. You won’t be able to catch anything anyway. Don’t waste your strength.”

Perrin didn’t answer and just rested quietly.

“This place is a very scary place… I hate you…I hate everything.”

He said after a long while. I already knew this, and I felt much of my energy leave my body. When we arrived to my lair, Perrin fell asleep. I wasn’t sure whether he fell asleep or fainted. The child’s condition was very bad.

“He will probably die soon.”

He would die if I didn’t do anything. When had he become so skinny? I observed Perrin. I lifted one of his arms. It was weightless. I tried to lift one of his legs. It was incredibly light. I held onto his shoulder and rolled him to the side, his body easily rolled. He was only bones under all the layer of clothes. It was the best to eat him now before he lost anymore weight. I understood this in my mind, but I felt greatly disturbed over the idea of Perrin dying.

“What do I want to do?”

I couldn’t decide. The night grew darker, and morning passed. I continued to watch the child sleeping.

“I…”

I hoped this child could recover and make it through this winter. I could only make my decision after thinking to myself all night long. My rationale didn’t make much sense, but I hoped that Perrin would not die.

“I hope to be with him a bit longer.”

Why? How come? I didn’t know. On our winter, it wasn’t like we had many chances to connect in anyway. The child was scared of me, and I kept the child with me. That was all.

Perrin and I, surprisingly didn’t have any sort of connection. I felt a mysterious emptiness. I stretched out my body and pat the child’s head. Eyes, nose, and his dry lips.

Let’s keep him alive this winter. I didn’t know what to do about next winter, but for now I wanted to save him. I made this decision, but saving him wasn’t an easy task. It was nearly impossible to hunt in this season, so there was nothing to feed the child.

“Something that’s edible…”

I had killed the deer that invaded my territory, but this wasn’t edible. The deer was so poisonous that even I couldn’t eat it. So, I had to throw that away.

“Something that’s edible.”

I looked around, then looked to myself. I was a mysterious mass of unknown monsters. I was made of more than 30 different monsters.

“Ah.”

I didn’t need to think twice. I had a generous amount of ingredients to fill Perrin’s stomach. I patted down my own body and left my lair. It would hurt to tear a portion of my body. So, I needed to go to a place where sound would not escape.

References

1. T/N: There is polite and casual speech in Korean. Perrin had been speaking in a respectful tone, but now it’s very casual like they are equals. This parts gets lost in translation because English doesn’t have such a system in place.