âIf you keep pampering me, I will become useless like this.â
I didnât want to linger on my bed all day long. After getting dressed, I have to go to the library again today and do a little more research. I also wanted to explore the rose garden in the backyard and go into town with Mercuris. I had a lot of work to do, I guess.
â⊠Even if I pamper you, you would not become useless.â
âMy body feels so good and fluffy that I donât even want to get up.â
I tried to pull my hand out, but it didnât budge. Gilbert-sama laughed deeply from his throat and hugged me even tighter.
It was similar to how I once got stuck in a big dogâs arms. The dog was cute, but it was heavy and I remembered being licked all over my face.
Gilbert-sama was also cute, but he was heavy so I felt a bit of a pain, and most importantly, my chest felt as if it was constricted, it was painful and I felt like I was going to lose my mind. It was very troubling.
âI have to endure it for a few more days, so donât get too agitated.â
âI donât mean that. I am talking seriously.â
I glared lightly at Gilbert-sama as I tried my best to keep my body as far away from him as possible. He didnât loosen his hold on me despite my efforts which made me a little angry.
âLydith, I want to stay like this a little longer. You gave yourself to me, I can do what I want, canât I?â
âYes, thatâs true, butâŠâ
How can he be so pushy sometimes?
He is cute when he is embarrassed, but when he is being forceful with me without embarrassment, I end up getting upset.
It was dark last night, so he probably didnât notice, but in the room with the light shining in, he could see my cheeks were stained.
Dimly, I understood.
Why were my emotions disturbed?
Why did it make my heart ache to be near him?
I am probably starting to think that Gilbert-sama is special to me.
I like him, I guess.
I like him. Gilbert-sama who is rude, coarse, unmannerly, shy, cute, clumsy, kind, and always tried to protect me like I am just a helpless girl.
But itâs not right.
I shouldnât.
It would be a weakness for me to have a special feeling towards someone.
Adoration can cloud oneâs judgement. It is not right to be misled by emotions.
So I must hide it.
âLydith. After your introduction, Iâll probably wonât be able to endure it anymore. Even now, Iâm honestly struggling to hold back. If the girl I like told me I could touch her, that would make me happy, wouldnât it?â
âYou said that talking about breast size wasnât appropriate for a morning topicâ
âIâm not particularly interested in the size, but I do want to touch you. I want to strip off your clothes and see everything, I want to touch you everywhere, I want to taste you. I like you, Lydith. You canât run away from me now, so get ready.â
â⊠OâŠkayâ
What should I do?
I was so happy that I couldnât reply to his   words properly as usual
It was as if a hard shell had been forcibly cracked open to expose the soft fruit inside.
It was as if the persona I had created up to now had become an idol.
I understood that for the Evandia royal family, marriage to the Ducal family of Anne Maria was necessary to maintain their power. I did not doubt Master Rafaelâs fondness for me, and I treated him with the same degree of familiarity that I had for my brother and Clive, but nothing more than that.
Before it got any further than that, Cynthia-san came to be by Rafael-samaâs side, which was also a big factor. I was not so foolish as to be attached to Raphael-sama, who had taken a liking to Cynthia-san.
Even if I came to see Gilbert-sama, I just chose the best choice then, and it was a calculation. There was no emotion involved.
And yet.
Why do I feel so happy?
I had to be firm.
I have to be able to accept our relationship, which might change when Gilbert-sama meets Cynthia-san.
I have to be able to think calmly and deal with the situation.
So I have to keep a lid on my needlessly inflated feelings and keep them hidden.
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